If Dogs Had Thumbs

We have a new family member at our house.  Her name is Penny and she is a Black Lab/Pittbull mix.  We adopted her from the pound about two weeks ago.  She is very sweet and loveable, but is only about 6 months old, which means she is sometimes very energetic and snippy.  She loves to chew, nip, jump on people and occasionally hide in a corner to pee on the carpet.  She is slowly improving and learning the ways of domestic life though, and for all the struggles of training a puppy, she is well worth the effort when she jumps up on the couch with me to snuggle and watch TV at night. 

Ever Seen a Chimp With a Leash Around His Neck??

While watching Penny play a couple of days ago, my daughter posed an interesting question.  What if dogs had thumbs?  Would they use their mouths so much?

And of course, that got me thinking about all the ways we would treat our animals differently if they did have thumbs.  Here are a few of the things that came to mind for me:

1.  We wouldn't use leashes anymore because we could just hold hands with our dogs.  Sure, that would leave them walking on 3 legs, but I've seen dogs that could do it.  Besides, it would seem more inhumane to put a leash around a two-thumbed creature's neck.  Ever seen a Chimpanzee with a leash around his neck?  I rest my case.

2.  They could open the door and go outside on their own.  No more doggie doors.

3.  They would fetch much differently. 

4.  Instead of biting the mailman, they might pinch him.

5.  They could eat at the table with us.  From a spoon. Or a fork.

6. They could hold the remote control.

7.  They could hand you things without slobbering all over them first.

8.  They could pick flowers, instead of peeing on them.

9.  They would dig holes with a shovel.

10.  Puppies might be thumb-suckers instead of incessant chewers.

  12. They could hitch-hike.

     13.  They could brush their own   teeth.

     14.  They could feed themselves   hamburgers and corn on the cob.

        15.  They could pick up their babies without looking like they're about to eat them.

16.  Maybe they could even use toilet paper????